Best candy behind Reese's Peanut Butter Cups? Skittles. Hands down. (I don't really know if they are in the same candy class. Chocolate and PB are not on the same level as a fruit party in my mouth. Both are equally deelish though. Oral-gasmic if I do say so myself)
There's a difference between the two though. All Reese's are created equal. (equally tasty..) Skittles throw some bullshit at me though.
Purple and Orange Skittles.
Terrible. Straight garbage. The guy who invented those two flavors deserves a junk punch. They are the reason why I can't be monogamous with Skittles in the fruit variety of candy. I know some people like both the orange and purple Skittles, actually find them quite refreshing. You know who those people are? Dumb. (Sorry if you fit into that category. get some new taste buds and then we can be friends) I hate them almost as much as I hate Tyler Hansborough's eyes. (See Donkey Punch from past blogs) I guess to be fair to the crappy Skittles guy, I also hate orange flavored Starburst. If I wanted orange flavor, I'd eat a damn orange. (Cherry and Strawberry are soooo much better when they are artificially flavored. You know I'm right)
So to the dick-hole invented shitty flavors, I say good day.
Monday, October 24, 2011
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Them Jeans...
Long time no blog. Apologies. Life has been a bit hectic. Which is what this post is about. Right now there are certain aspects of my life that I wish were different, wish I could change, but everyone has those, right? ANYWHOO...
You know that one pair of jeans that you see and you HAVE TO HAVE BECAUSE GIRRRRRRL THEY GONNA LOOK SO GOOD ON ME!!! (Thats totally how I talk too...) And I mean..they do look good on, or so I think. I got the booty going (It doesn't really take much for me to get that going though..) just struttin' my stuff down the street lookin all good. But whats going on behind the seams of those jeans (haha seams...kinda like scenes..anyways). They look good to the outside eye, but in all reality, they are a disaster waiting to happen. Like muffin top disguised under a flowy shirt, and you know that spot that gets all worn out where your thighs rub? (you understand if you have thighs like mine. My step-dad calls me thunder thighs. That was nice to grow up to.) Well that fabric is long gone, even after your mom has patched them a time or two (or five...) but you're the only one who knows that these pants are about to go to hell. Just don't bend down too much, or try to squat..but they look fine in the mirror...
Yeah, thats a certain aspect of my life right now. Looks great from the outside, but is all kinds of wrong that people don't see. I can't afford new pants either. Completely unrelated, but this is actually happening to my jeans too, which succcccckkks. (except the muffin top part..I don't have that. Maybe I should just buy pajama jeans. Those look nice. And no one can tell that they're actually a stretchy, lounge pants material. Yeah...those will work..and they come with some free t-shirts. Boss.)
Sorry for the depressing post..I tried to turn it into something funny? Not my best attempt
On a ligher note, I got a high score on a test! It was to find out if I had ADD/ADHD. High score. Still counts. Now I need to be diagnosed with CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) and I'll have a hall pass at work for naps and red rover (that would be the perfect life..get me some fooseball in there too..)
Here's a picture I drew during a meeting at work.
You know that one pair of jeans that you see and you HAVE TO HAVE BECAUSE GIRRRRRRL THEY GONNA LOOK SO GOOD ON ME!!! (Thats totally how I talk too...) And I mean..they do look good on, or so I think. I got the booty going (It doesn't really take much for me to get that going though..) just struttin' my stuff down the street lookin all good. But whats going on behind the seams of those jeans (haha seams...kinda like scenes..anyways). They look good to the outside eye, but in all reality, they are a disaster waiting to happen. Like muffin top disguised under a flowy shirt, and you know that spot that gets all worn out where your thighs rub? (you understand if you have thighs like mine. My step-dad calls me thunder thighs. That was nice to grow up to.) Well that fabric is long gone, even after your mom has patched them a time or two (or five...) but you're the only one who knows that these pants are about to go to hell. Just don't bend down too much, or try to squat..but they look fine in the mirror...
Yeah, thats a certain aspect of my life right now. Looks great from the outside, but is all kinds of wrong that people don't see. I can't afford new pants either. Completely unrelated, but this is actually happening to my jeans too, which succcccckkks. (except the muffin top part..I don't have that. Maybe I should just buy pajama jeans. Those look nice. And no one can tell that they're actually a stretchy, lounge pants material. Yeah...those will work..and they come with some free t-shirts. Boss.)
Sorry for the depressing post..I tried to turn it into something funny? Not my best attempt
On a ligher note, I got a high score on a test! It was to find out if I had ADD/ADHD. High score. Still counts. Now I need to be diagnosed with CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) and I'll have a hall pass at work for naps and red rover (that would be the perfect life..get me some fooseball in there too..)
Here's a picture I drew during a meeting at work.
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