You know what I just realized? I'd be pissed if I was the guy that shines the Vince Lombardi trophy. Like, you take allllll that time to make sure it looks perfect for presentation. No smudges, no finger prints. nothing. Then the then second procession through the winning team and BAM! Smudges all up in that trophies business. Someone worked hard on making that presentable. Respect that.
The only reason I'm not asleep right now is because Glee starts again. So lets move on past the smudginess and get to the GLEE!
P.S. Aaaron Rodgers just won a car for being MVP. I hope it gets smudged up.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Man Hands
I didn't have any weird dreams last night, which is quite alarming since 1) I ate Chinese food and b) I watched a dinosaur show before I went to bed.(dinosaurs are awesome) And I got nothing. NOTHING. A bit disappointing to say the very least. So I had to come up with something...
Man hands.
Do you know what it's like to be a girl with man hands? I do. It's not pleasant. Sure, I can do lots of cool stuff like...umm....ok hands are hands. But they do look pretty cool when I do my velociraptor impression. (someday when I'm cool I'll post a picture of it. Until that day, I'm sure imagination will suffice) But thanks to this genetic mutation(thanks mom and dad) I can't paint my nails, wear rings, get a cute pair of gloves, or anything like that. You know why? Because it looks like a man is trying to wear them. It just doesn't work out well. Meeting people is awkward too. I go to shake their hand, and once they grasp mine, their eyes widen a bit, and try to sneek a peek at what they're dealing with. I also get the lovely nicknames like Meathooks or Banana Hands. I don't even know what that means. I've also gotten a few handjob jokes. THAT'S a great first impression...I'll admit, I laugh at the man hands episode of Seinfeld, but I die a little inside every time I do..
Ok, not really. But still. It kinda stinks. At least I have good hair.
Man hands.
Do you know what it's like to be a girl with man hands? I do. It's not pleasant. Sure, I can do lots of cool stuff like...umm....ok hands are hands. But they do look pretty cool when I do my velociraptor impression. (someday when I'm cool I'll post a picture of it. Until that day, I'm sure imagination will suffice) But thanks to this genetic mutation(thanks mom and dad) I can't paint my nails, wear rings, get a cute pair of gloves, or anything like that. You know why? Because it looks like a man is trying to wear them. It just doesn't work out well. Meeting people is awkward too. I go to shake their hand, and once they grasp mine, their eyes widen a bit, and try to sneek a peek at what they're dealing with. I also get the lovely nicknames like Meathooks or Banana Hands. I don't even know what that means. I've also gotten a few handjob jokes. THAT'S a great first impression...I'll admit, I laugh at the man hands episode of Seinfeld, but I die a little inside every time I do..
Ok, not really. But still. It kinda stinks. At least I have good hair.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
I have rekindled an old flame
And that flame burns bright for one thing.
Chinese food.
Once I get the hankering for it, theres no stopping me. I'm like one of those kids at the park, you know the really annoying, screaming ones? Yeah, thats me until I get chinese food. It consumes me. Thank god I had a quick outlet tonight.
My friend Nick and I always eat together on Wednesday nights, our tradition. This evening we decided on Chinese, thank god (it ended the chance of me sobbing for chinese on days end). Our friend Nate came along too. One thing I learned at this dinner, is to not talk about your lady parts in front of guys. Nate almost threw up on two separate occasions. (I'm saying it was in the general conversation of lady parts, not just MY lady parts. and I'm sticking to that.) Upon hindsight of this conversation, I realize "Hey Gabi, maybe that is why you don't have a boyfriend." Then I immediately threw that thought to the wind. I'm awesome. If a man cant take a conversation about people feeling my uterus, then I don't know if you can really call him a man. Regardless of this all, I'm sure I'm going to have an awesome dream tonight thanks to the Chinese. So you have that to look forward to.
P.S. for some reason, my couch smells like feet.
Chinese food.
Once I get the hankering for it, theres no stopping me. I'm like one of those kids at the park, you know the really annoying, screaming ones? Yeah, thats me until I get chinese food. It consumes me. Thank god I had a quick outlet tonight.
My friend Nick and I always eat together on Wednesday nights, our tradition. This evening we decided on Chinese, thank god (it ended the chance of me sobbing for chinese on days end). Our friend Nate came along too. One thing I learned at this dinner, is to not talk about your lady parts in front of guys. Nate almost threw up on two separate occasions. (I'm saying it was in the general conversation of lady parts, not just MY lady parts. and I'm sticking to that.) Upon hindsight of this conversation, I realize "Hey Gabi, maybe that is why you don't have a boyfriend." Then I immediately threw that thought to the wind. I'm awesome. If a man cant take a conversation about people feeling my uterus, then I don't know if you can really call him a man. Regardless of this all, I'm sure I'm going to have an awesome dream tonight thanks to the Chinese. So you have that to look forward to.
P.S. for some reason, my couch smells like feet.
I'm baaaack
No, I'm not dead.
I've just been really busy avoiding doing anything other than what I have to do for classes. College may be the best years of your life, but the last semester sucks balls. So much stress, finding a job, passing my classes, etc that I've just been putting new posts off. I've had some weird dreams, don't get me wrong, just haven't transcribed them into word form
But to the point. I've decided that yeah, a blog about my dreams is cool, but I like to say lots of stuff! So basically I'm going to write about things that I think are funny. I think I'm funny. So why not write about myself? I can also thank starting up this blog again to Hyperbole and a half. Check it out. Pure comedy
www.hyperboleandahalf.com
So hopefully, if you're still following this, a lot more posts will be coming your way, and a few more laughs will be coming to your life.
I've just been really busy avoiding doing anything other than what I have to do for classes. College may be the best years of your life, but the last semester sucks balls. So much stress, finding a job, passing my classes, etc that I've just been putting new posts off. I've had some weird dreams, don't get me wrong, just haven't transcribed them into word form
But to the point. I've decided that yeah, a blog about my dreams is cool, but I like to say lots of stuff! So basically I'm going to write about things that I think are funny. I think I'm funny. So why not write about myself? I can also thank starting up this blog again to Hyperbole and a half. Check it out. Pure comedy
www.hyperboleandahalf.com
So hopefully, if you're still following this, a lot more posts will be coming your way, and a few more laughs will be coming to your life.
Friday, September 24, 2010
But I am le tired...
Sorry to disappoint everyone, but the dream world has been lacking, or I've been lacking in memory. Either Or. There have a been a few dreams, I'm kind of embarrassed about them so they wont be posted. Sorry again. Anyways, on to the point.
Last night was rough, only about 4 hours of sleep, with a 14+ hour day ahead of me. My lifestyle of working, school, and more working is starting to catch up with me. Bad news bears. But in the short amount of time I was asleep I had a pretty kickin' dream. I worked at the restaurant last night, and we listen to a lot of jazz/old crooner music, which I dig. So I had that kind of tune in my head all night. That developed a dream into where I was back in high school, playing in our jazz band (Yeah, 6 years of jazz band. and I loved it) We were playing some big band stuff, opening for a surprise act. Well the act turned out to be the Beatles. Yup. 2010 and it was the original Beatles. Too bad I didn't get enough sleep to continue the dream, so I only got to hear "I wanna hold your hand" before I woke up.
Thank you three color tomato chicken tortellini soup, for that dream.
Last night was rough, only about 4 hours of sleep, with a 14+ hour day ahead of me. My lifestyle of working, school, and more working is starting to catch up with me. Bad news bears. But in the short amount of time I was asleep I had a pretty kickin' dream. I worked at the restaurant last night, and we listen to a lot of jazz/old crooner music, which I dig. So I had that kind of tune in my head all night. That developed a dream into where I was back in high school, playing in our jazz band (Yeah, 6 years of jazz band. and I loved it) We were playing some big band stuff, opening for a surprise act. Well the act turned out to be the Beatles. Yup. 2010 and it was the original Beatles. Too bad I didn't get enough sleep to continue the dream, so I only got to hear "I wanna hold your hand" before I woke up.
Thank you three color tomato chicken tortellini soup, for that dream.
Friday, September 3, 2010
A week in review
It's been an interesting week on the dream front for me. Too many to even fully remember but there are a few that I can recall short bits so I'll fill you in on them.
- I lost all my teeth. It was nasty. and not only did I lose them, they started to decay and get all disgusting after they even fell out of my mouth. So note to self, don't ever mouth wash in dreams if you have loose teeth.
- Everyone at my jobs hated me because I like peanut butter sandwiches. I was referred to as "the 12 year old who we would like if she would grow up and eat a real sandwich". My sister also decided to lock me in a closet.
- My twin sister and I produced a broadway musical all about hats, and also included cats, inside of an apartment in Chicago, while some of our friends were shoving bits of banana's into pineapples. I have no idea what that even means.
Thats all I can really remember right now. A let down I know, but at least its something. I KNOW I had a really weird dream last night, being that I ate chips and salsa before bed. As soon as I remember it you KNOW it's going to be on here...
- I lost all my teeth. It was nasty. and not only did I lose them, they started to decay and get all disgusting after they even fell out of my mouth. So note to self, don't ever mouth wash in dreams if you have loose teeth.
- Everyone at my jobs hated me because I like peanut butter sandwiches. I was referred to as "the 12 year old who we would like if she would grow up and eat a real sandwich". My sister also decided to lock me in a closet.
- My twin sister and I produced a broadway musical all about hats, and also included cats, inside of an apartment in Chicago, while some of our friends were shoving bits of banana's into pineapples. I have no idea what that even means.
Thats all I can really remember right now. A let down I know, but at least its something. I KNOW I had a really weird dream last night, being that I ate chips and salsa before bed. As soon as I remember it you KNOW it's going to be on here...
Friday, August 27, 2010
Veggie Scampi!
So I work at a restaurant, and being vegetarian, I only have one entree option, the Veggie Scampi, which is delicious by the way. Anyways, now that you know that...
It's the end of the night at Water Street Grill, and I only have one thing on my mind. Veggie Scampi. Only one thing, I'm broke. Like straight up broke. So I can't afford to buy it. (sad face, I know right?) So, I have all the stuff to make it at home, but I have NO idea how to do it. So I go up to my boss and BEG for the recipe. Wont stop bothering him until he gives it to me. Well he wont. So what do I do? I decide I need to break into the restaurant and steal the recipe! So i'm decked out just like the hamburglar, tip toeing around the kitchen, trying to get that recipe. All of a sudden all the lights come on, and I'm at a party with the staff from WSG. So we decide we need to go to the bar, and I'm walking and all of a sudden, someone grabs my hand. I'm way confused. It's one of the cooks from water street, and he wont let go of my hand. Then that fast forward movement happens, and all of a sudden we're living together..then married..
then I wake up. asking myself again.."what did I eat last night?!..."
It's the end of the night at Water Street Grill, and I only have one thing on my mind. Veggie Scampi. Only one thing, I'm broke. Like straight up broke. So I can't afford to buy it. (sad face, I know right?) So, I have all the stuff to make it at home, but I have NO idea how to do it. So I go up to my boss and BEG for the recipe. Wont stop bothering him until he gives it to me. Well he wont. So what do I do? I decide I need to break into the restaurant and steal the recipe! So i'm decked out just like the hamburglar, tip toeing around the kitchen, trying to get that recipe. All of a sudden all the lights come on, and I'm at a party with the staff from WSG. So we decide we need to go to the bar, and I'm walking and all of a sudden, someone grabs my hand. I'm way confused. It's one of the cooks from water street, and he wont let go of my hand. Then that fast forward movement happens, and all of a sudden we're living together..then married..
then I wake up. asking myself again.."what did I eat last night?!..."
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